Institute for Climate Change Prevention
Studies are being done, on the effect that the excessive use of snow clearing machinery, is having on the global warming problem that faces the world. Mr Sosmall McKluskey of the Institute was overheard to say that an alternative to snow machines was under investigation, and was in the advanced stages, but it all hinged on the availability of raw materials.
The ICCP has been publishing advertisements on television, radio and the internet requesting all menopausal women in England to congregate in the most snow affected areas for consultation with authorities. Mr McKluskey says that they are hoping to harness the heat produced from hot flushes/flashes to melt the snow in these areas. For the purposes of this article I will call them flushers and not flashers, for obvious reasons, and anyway this article is meant for family viewing.
The idea came about from studies done at the institute where it was found that one hot flush could melt an average sized ice cube from 5 paces.
It is hoping to prove that if thousands of flushing women were to link arms and advance on the snow with the other thousands following in order to replace the “burnt out” flushers with fresh ones, the snow would melt and flow away into the storm water drains. The resultant fast melt would radiate into the most inaccessible places and would be energy free. The cost saving on fuel, wear and tear on machinery and wages would be astronomic. It is seen to be a dual purpose solution in that while the women are supplying the heat they will be cooling down at the same time.
The South African guvment has latched onto this idea and spokesman for Eishkom, Mr Hotflush Mobusa, has said that all women would be conscripted into the peace force for the duration of their menopausal time span. The heat generated would be used to power the generators at all the coal burning power stations, thus reducing the output of greenhouse gasses and cutting costs. A service supplying a flusher for individual households, who do not have one of their own, is also on the cards.
All females of menopausal age have to register before the 30th May 2010 so as to ensure sufficient power for the world cup. Any queries can be answered on www.hotflushers.com
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